Networking Art- part 2

A reader wrote: "In Networking Art - part 1, you gave three tips that would help us get a conversation going with someone we meet at a networking event. My problem is that I'm too uncomfortable to even approach people. Do you have any suggestions about how to deal with my nervousness?"

First, before you go to the event, bring a clear picture to your mind of a time when you were feeling very comfortable and confident in a social setting. This may have been at a family gathering, or with close friends, people in your faith community, or people you pursue your hobby with. Let yourself re-live the event--the smiling and talking that you did without thinking, how you circulated through the crowd, the un-self-conscious way you asked questions and exchanged stories. You are creating your own role model based on your own feelings and behavior.

Second, deliberately bring these feelings and behavior with you to the networking event. This requires that you replace your habit of "I am uncomfortable at networking events" with the model of you at this other event. You really do have the power within to replace the self-defeating habit with the self-energizing habit.

Third, think of yourself as the host of the networking event. This means thinking that you're responsible for the happiness and comfort of the others. Your role as host takes you out of yourself and helps strengthen the positive self-image you're bringing with you.

You may not have many opportunites to talk about yourself and your business when you're serving as the host, however, you will gain confidence and enjoyment. This will support all your networking activities for the future, helping you get out and network as often as you need to.